4 years ago, I set off with a close friend starting in Astoria, Oregon with the goal to hike along the coast to California. We managed to piece together different beaches, highways, and hiking trails to complete this trail. It was sometimes stressful because we had to worry about the tides or hike alongside logging trucks going 80 MPH, but for me, the most challenging aspect was how emotionally dis regulated I was during the whole trail. My dear friend, Savannah was an amazing hiking partner, guiding me when I needed it most, and being patient when I would cry uncontrollably. I wondered, "how could I feel this way when I am in one of the most beautiful states?"
Unbeknownst to me, I was already dreading the start of the school year, and soon after, that would be the last year I would teach in the public school system. I was also grappling with untreated depression. It took me a whole year to work through those emotions, but I realized that hiking a long trail every summer wasn't my "cure all." (Even though I hope to another thru-hike soon)
I am so grateful that I hiked this trail, but I told my friend once we get the California border that I would never go back....., but just as life always goes, this week, I am heading back to the coast in a more leisurely manner, driving and camping along the coast with a fresh set of eyes.
The Oregon Coast Trail was the precipice of me deciding to trust myself, take care of my mental health, and find jobs that align more deeply with my values. While I miss having summers off, I do not miss the constant battle of depression, I had once July would roll around with the school year looming over me.
I am excited to go back with a new perspective and to take in parts of Oregon I didn't fully appreciate at the time.